(crédit photos: Charlotte Lacoursiere)
Derby Name: Beet’Hell’Juice
Position: Horizontal (often in spite of myself)
Bio: I’ve seen Beetlejuice about a hundred and sixty-seven times and it keeps getting funnier every single time I see it. Not to mention the fact that you’re talking to a dead person. Now, what do you think? You think I’m qualified?
Height: With or without skates?
Catchphrase: It’s show time!
Likes: Hamster skateboarding videos
Derby Name: Gunmoll Mindy
Bio: A fabled rum runner from the lush pipeline of southern Ontario, Gunmoll Mindy packed up her skates and hooch and headed for the port of Montreal when the heat found her clandestine stills and threatened to throw her in the clink for some hard time. With the trail finally cooled , Mindy found a new group of hooligans intimately familiar with the wild world of contraband to assist her in her operations. She now divides her time between laying low from the law, laying out jammers on the track and keeping glasses full in all the underground establishments of this fair city
Derby Name: Jesus Rice
Position: Like Rad
Bio: Asian Jesus promises to love you long time.
Catchphrase: The Price is Rice
Likes: Burgers. Tacos. Hawaiian pizza.
Dislikes: Being mistaken for the only other Asian in the league- unless I can take her awesome credit which happened once after the Sexpos played against Tampa Bay. After the game, a Tampa player told me I played really well, to which I responded, you too. Why take the time to explain they got the wrong Asian when we can share each other’s greatness. I’ll take it.
Derby Name: Just’n Powers
Bio: Under the helmet, a head, and under the head, a neck. A neck on shoulders, and shoulders over arms… Should I keep going or do you get it?! At the bottom there are skates, and that’s all that matters, no?!
Height: One thousand and twelve fourty cat hair stacked
Catchphrase: Once upon a jam, …
Likes: Hitting you out when you thought you were safe. My teammates too.
Derby Name: Radical Ed
Position: Like Jesus.
Bio: Ed will introduce Ed! Space explorer and bounty hunter on the side, Ed is only passing by. Say hi!
Height: From average to tall depending on who’s standing next to me.
Likes: Video games, space, cats, Ein and the Bebop.
Dislikes: Getting up early
Derby Name: Tabarnouk
Position: Bench Coach
Bio: Tabarnouk! / Proper (but not that much) and feminine noun. From the Latin tabarnacalum. Shortened as: Barnouk. Synonym: Shoosh! A Québécois expression which is used during play to express anger, hostility, pain, elation or surprise. Depending on the context in which it is used, “Tabarnouk!” can also heighten the implication of the words surrounding it. It is used for its cathartic properties and its ability to distract the enemy. The noun “Tabarnouk” is often considered to be an insult or a swear word in popular Québécois vernacular. It has to be used with caution, only by the initiated. Often imitated, “Tabarnouk” is never equaled. “Tabarnouche”, “Tabarnane” and other “Tabarouette” learned this at their own cost.
Catchphrase: Ah ben château!
Likes: Teamwork, raccoons, nachos with cream cheese salsa, skirts, and coffee.
Dislikes: Mornings without coffee, lazy people, et people ceux qui ne travaille pas en équipe.