Montréal Roller Derby
(crédit photos: Alice Beaubien)
Derby Name: 2pack shaker
Number: 58
Bio: I discovered roller derby while I was on vacation in the US, and two weeks later I bought skates and signed up for bootcamp. I’m not an athletic type of girl, but I love suffering for derby.
Height: 5’4
Catchphrase: I’m sorry!
Likes: Arts, my dog Winston, potatoes
Dislikes: eggs and western movies
Pronouns: She/her
Derby Name: Agnès Mac Fail
Number: 1921
Derby Name: AlicHe
Number: 31
Position: Pivot/blocker
Bio: Two years at Roller Derby Québec, my promotion won the fresh and furious in 2016, photogapher of MTLRD since march 2019.
Height: 6ft, 182cm
Catchphrase: Who tries nothing receives nothing
Likes: Poutine, cinema and cats
Dislikes: Wheels in butt
Pronouns: She/her
Derby Name: Ana’n’ass
Number: 67
Position: Blocker/pivot/jammer
Bio: Newly arrived from France. For my second season of roller derby I’ve come to move up in the ranks of the Smash Squad.
Height: 157cm
Likes: eat, beer, Cats
Pronouns: She/her
Derby Name: Apoc Lypz
Number: 13
Derby Name: Artax Forever
Number: 39
Bio: A piece of fresh meat from the 2019 Bootcamp. First year doing roller derby. She is a Capricorn and loves moonlit walks on the beach.
Catchphrase: You rock, rock. Nobody rocks like this rock sits. The rock just sits there and is, and that’s what we need.
Likes: Cats, burritos, tacos, soccer
Dislikes: When something falls on the ground
Pronouns: She/her
Derby Name: Fishnet
Number: 96
Derby Name: Block to the future
Number: 1985
Position: Blocker/pivot?
Bio: BTTF is a derby baby fresh out of bootcamp. The secret of her positivity is maybe that she saw what awaits her in the future… A Delorean would be useful!
Height: Very tall in bunny scale
Catchphrase: You shall not pass
Likes: Nature, ska, joy…oh yeah and video games
Dislikes: Mornings -_-
Pronouns: She/her
Derby Name: Poly Sporin
Number: à venir
Derby Name: Boy Bye
Number: TBD
Position: Verse (:
Bio: I was a skater boy she said seeya later boy, now I’m a roller skater boy. Byeeee.
Height: 5’3″… with shoes on
Likes: Cooking, climbing and puzzles
Dislikes: Gender binary and small talk
Pronouns: They/them
Derby Name: Cat Sup
Number: 623
Bio: Fell in love watching Derby in 2014, but never picked it up until 2019 :3 Super newbie but the sport is exactly like Fencing…except people hit you…really hard….and it feels nice. uwu
Height: 5’4″
Catchphrase: Mow
Likes: Playing anime fighting games (PLAY GUILTY GEAR :3). Watching anime, my cat, sleeping.
Dislikes: Being inconsiderate, not having enough time >:C, loud noises
Pronouns: She/her
Derby Name: DreadZilla
Number: 99
Bio: I started Derby in 2018, and after going through bootcamp twice, I’m very proud to finally be fresh meat on Smash Squad! Life makes much more sense while rolling, especially when turning left ;)
Height: five feet five
Likes: pure and simple immaterial pleasures.
Dislikes: The f*cking capitalist system, money, and all the values related to that.
Pronouns: She/her
Derby Name: Flash Bang
Number: 470
Derby Name: Glitter Bomb
Number: 5
Position: Blocker
Bio: Derby is the first sport that really vibes with me! I’m freaking out, I love it! I am a Hufflepuff, I have 2 cats and I always have glitter, a smile and a positive attitude :)
Height: Just tall enough!
Catchphrase: What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger
Likes: Cats, wine, derby and Harry Potter
Dislikes: Your negative attitude!
Pronouns: She/her
Derby Name: Hentai-Social
Number: 726
Position: Jammer
Bio: I was looking for an inclusive community and thrill, I’ve been served.
Height: 165cm
Catchphrase: I’m living my rock
Likes: Anime, food, ferrets
Dislikes: Drama
Pronouns: They/them
Derby Name: Http Error
Number: 404
Position: Jammer
Bio: Freash meat from the 2019 Bootcamp. I was in the need for some “relaxing me time” ?
Height: 167 cm
Catchphrase: Change is the only constant of my Universe
Likes: I like too many things to make a list. I am not good at being concis, and I would look like a terrible parent if I wrote “gin” right next to “my children.”
Dislikes: Climatosceptics, flat-earthers, Trump, pedophiles, the really bad drivers that don’t look in their mirrors, tequila, the terrible two, the fucking four… Finally I am good at making lists.
Pronouns: She/her
Derby Name: La Gata Cristi
Number: 333
Position: Jammer?
Bio: I’ve never been a sports person. More like a nap after aperitif person. I’ve discovered a passion for roller derby and I surprised myself doing burpees and squats at nap time. La Gata se despierta!
Height: 171 cm
Catchphrase: Meow
Likes: Grandma stuff: making preserves, knitting and crocheting while drinking michelada.
Dislikes: Pain
Pronouns: She/her
Derby Name: Meanie Van
Number: 57
Position: Front of the pack
Bio: A mean all-season, versatile, 4-wheel drive! Can withstand high impact collisions, has advanced safety features, rust-proof and ready to roll!
Height: 5’7″
Catchphrase: Vroom vroom
Likes: Fresh Pavement
Dislikes: Traffic Jams
Pronouns: They/she
Derby Name: NOT NICE
Number: 1313
Position: TBD
Bio: I used to give penalties, now I try to avoide getting them…
Height: Too tall even when I try to get low
Catchphrase: I’ll sleep tomorow
Likes: Discovering new chip flavours!
Dislikes: Not being able to finish my knitting projets..
Pronouns: She/her
Derby Name: Panty Slayer
Number: 680
Position: Blocker
Height: 170cm
Catchphrase: The sky is der Himmel
Likes: Mornings, baking pastries, when I manage to push a jammer off the track
Dislikes: Soup, small talk, waiting in line, people telling me how “amazing” Berlin is.
Pronouns: She/her
Derby Name: PeurPanique
Number: 35
Position: Blocker
Height: many centimeters
Catchphrase: It’s gonna be alright
Likes: Roller derby (and ice cream)
Dislikes: Concussions
Pronouns: She/her
Derby Name: Road Runner
Number: 649
Derby Name: Trottoir Barré
Number: 415
Bio: First year doing roller derby. I am looking forward to having a new community and learning a new sport after having played ringette growing up.
Height: 5’6
Catchphrase: Sidewalk closed? Yeah right.
Likes: Walking
Dislikes: Construction
Pronouns: She/her
Derby Name: Ur Mom
Number: 202
Position: TBD
Bio: My name is UR MOM and yet I am the youngest one in the league
Height: 5’7″
Catchphrase: aaawweeeiiillllleee
Likes: food, musique, comedic acting
Dislikes: food waste
Pronouns: She/her
Derby Name: Vas-y-Line !
Number: 1308
Position: On my wheels
Height: 169
Catchphrase: It has to slide!
Likes: French fries, beer, cats and unicorns
Dislikes: Warm beer with too much foam
Pronouns: She/her
Derby Name: Witch Bitch
Number: 6666
Derby Name: Zom’beer
Number: 2122
Position: Jammer/pivot
Bio: The little French girl who just arrived in Montreal in September. I played roller derby for a year for a small team in France in 2017/2018.
Height: 159
Catchphrase: If there’s life, there’s hope.
Likes: Zombies, Beer, cheese, cooking, Books
Dislikes: Endive swith ham
Pronouns: She/her
Derby Name: Conasse La Barbare
Number:
Position: Head Coach
Bio: From super fan to player, to ref, to coach. I eat derby for breakfast. It is my 7th year as a coach and first one as head coach for MTLRD.
Height: 5’9”
Catchphrase: PUUUUSH
Likes: Animals and alcohol
Dislikes: Misunderstandings
Pronouns: She/her
Derby Name: Camionnette
Number:
Position: Coach
Bio: Ice, in-line or roller skating…I am clearly better on skates than on my feet.
Height: With or without the skates?
Catchphrase: Touch yourselves
Likes: Meeting my primary needs: eat, drink and sleep.
Dislikes: Folding laundry
Pronouns: She/her
Derby Name: Laisse Tomber les filles
Number: 174
Position: Coach
Bio: No idea how I ended up here. But I love the journey.
Height: 5’2
Catchphrase: What?!?!?
Likes: Making the sSmash do endurance drills.
Dislikes: Doing endurance drills.
Pronouns: She/her
Derby Name: Ex’Squeeze-Me
Number: 777
Bio: As clumsy off-skates as on skates!
Height: A little bit taller on skates
Catchphrase: Oups!
Likes: Moving all the time, talking all the time and laughing all the time
Dislikes: Chaos and not being able to move, talk or laugh
Pronouns: She/her